FLATWORLD TOUR
Add comment May 29th, 2006
Archive for May, 2006
Global Warming
Add comment May 28th, 2006
You all hear the same predictions I’m hearin about Global Warming. Greenland’s glaciers are meltin. The ocean’s are risin. The aquifers are dryin. The planet’s heatin. The hurricanes are worse. The ozone’s depleted.
You can’t read a newspaper or turn on the boob tube without some scientist scarin you to death or some expert reassuring you or some politico sayin the facts aren’t here to make an educated judgement.
Me, I’m a born pessimist. I figure things are gonna get worse.
I figure the planet’s doomed. I figure the rainforests are gonna get clear cut, the arctic’s gonna get drilled, the resources will be sucked dry, the penguins are gonna get eaten. TV’s are gonna get the size of drive-in theater screens. Can’t stop it, why shout and holler??
I guess now we got to think about the rest of the planet. Billions of people we won’t meet. All buyin fast food penguin burgers and playin pirated American violent video games. When a time finally arrives at the burger joints and the teenage cashier tells you, “I’m sorry, gramps, the Big Macs are extinct,” that’s when the brutal reality will hit home. By then, I’m afraid, it’ll be too late.
But on the South End we try to control our lives as best we can. Got our own wells, cut our own wood, use up our own resources, I guess. Explains maybe why the glaciers are all gone on Mt. Camano and the winters are warmer, all those woodstoves emittin heat-trappin particulates. And I don’t even want to think about the poor penguins waitin down at the Head for the ice bridge to form once again. They’re on their own now….. just like the rest of us.
The South End String Band vs. Darwin
Add comment May 28th, 2006
There’s an assumption in Evolution Theory that us Homo Sapiens are getting smarter . You figure the dumb ones get run over on the highway of life like possums who think those 2 bright lights incoming at 60 miles per hour are maybe a fast sunrise.
Course, there’s what we scientists call ANOMALIES, glitches in the theory. Mountain climbers come to mind. Or race car drivers. Meth users. And politicians. Folks who just can’t get enuff abuse, I guess. Survival skills dialed right down to nothin.
Lately I been thinking the whole theory needs to be revamped. I think maybe the entire species is startin to move backwards ever since television was invented. And the TV dinner. And the Lazy-Boy Recliner. It’s like Reverse Evolution. Or Intelligent Decline.
TV gets worse every year. But people watch more of it. Our brains, after 16 re-run episodes of CHEERS, are the size of a cocktail peanut. My remote control doesn’t even come with an OFF button. You rent a DVD, it comes with all the goof-ups and deleted scenes extra so you can watch the crummy parts of the movie too. That’s like the Band here sellin you our CD greatest Hit and throwin in all the bad songs. Free of charge. What?…. Wait a minute, we do……
Like I was sayin before that last unfortunate admission: we got to put a halt to this skid our species seems to be on, we got to swerve BEFORE it’s too late. We got to turn off the boob tube and turn this evolution thing back in the right direction. It’ll kill our CD sales, that’s for sure, but it’s a small price to pay for higher IQ’s and less politicians.
