bird flu at the snowgoose!

February 28th, 2007

We been hearin for a couple of years now about the Bird Flu Pandemic that’s on its way. Dire warnins. Terrible predictions. Some chicken farmer gets sick in the Java jungle, it’s on the news. World Health Organization sends a team, quarantines the village, makes sure the HN 51 virus is neutralized. WITH extreme prejudice. Kill the flock. Burn the banties. Nothin less than the savin of the human race is at stake.

So along comes the Snow Goose Festival and what do THEY do? That’s right: invite about two godzillion of these typhoid mary’s to camp in our fields, spreadin god knows what virus in their prodigious fertilizers and then send human beings traipsing down to be exposed and contaminated.

I am amazed and alarmed! Where is the Island County Health Department Rapid Response Team? Where is Homeland Security? Oh sure, they can stop a South End String Band 4th of July concert over concerns WE”RE a public menace, send the Gestapo down to Tyee Grocery and shut it down, but get on top of this Bird Flu Pandemic? Naw, it’s okay, go ahead, destroy the planet.

The Band was gonna boycott. I mean somebody’s got to have some starch in their boxer’s even if it is unpopular. Somebody’s got to stand up and yell FIRE when they see smoke. ….. but then they offered us free dinner if we’d stay quiet. And we decided maybe we were over-reactin a little. I mean, come on, the WHOLE planet?? I doubt it. But we did make DAMN sure that bbq dinner was NOT chicken. Or turkey. Or any other virus infected bird dinner. Migratin salmon, we were assured. NOT that farm stuff that spreads Fish Flu.

So sit back and stop worryin and let’s all just enjoy this next calmin number.

Entry Filed under: deer in the headlights (concert commentary)